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gemfyreSomeone make me do something stupid!!
I need to take a risk, I need to prove that I'm worth something.
I'm just so fucking scared of losing people I love and fucking myself up beyond repair.
But I WANT to do it to. I want to make people worried and excited and jealous and envious and everything dammit. And I've been trying to but when it all comes down it I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW. I also lack the bravery to do shit like that.
I'll jump out of a plane no problems (but not without a parachute!), but to me kisses are sacred and I'd be awfully reluctant to kiss another guy on the lips.
*sigh*
Sorry if I'm too sheltered and romantic, I just like things to be nice and simple, not a convoluted headfuck. I don't have time to be screwed up.
How do I unknot myself? If I could smooth out and untie my mind maybe I wouldn't always be so bloody exhausted.
I don't know what is the truth and what is my skewed perception. Why do I feel like the only one that is seen as needing to change? Does no-one else believe in self-improvement? Or are you all content to wallow in your lots and complain you never have enough, instead of doing something about it?
*frustrate*
Why can't we all change a little and meet in the middle? Why does no-one believe in compromise, I feel like I'm doing all the work and having to transform into someone else. Why is everyone else perfect and not me??
I need to take a risk, I need to prove that I'm worth something.
I'm just so fucking scared of losing people I love and fucking myself up beyond repair.
But I WANT to do it to. I want to make people worried and excited and jealous and envious and everything dammit. And I've been trying to but when it all comes down it I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW. I also lack the bravery to do shit like that.
I'll jump out of a plane no problems (but not without a parachute!), but to me kisses are sacred and I'd be awfully reluctant to kiss another guy on the lips.
*sigh*
Sorry if I'm too sheltered and romantic, I just like things to be nice and simple, not a convoluted headfuck. I don't have time to be screwed up.
How do I unknot myself? If I could smooth out and untie my mind maybe I wouldn't always be so bloody exhausted.
I don't know what is the truth and what is my skewed perception. Why do I feel like the only one that is seen as needing to change? Does no-one else believe in self-improvement? Or are you all content to wallow in your lots and complain you never have enough, instead of doing something about it?
*frustrate*
Why can't we all change a little and meet in the middle? Why does no-one believe in compromise, I feel like I'm doing all the work and having to transform into someone else. Why is everyone else perfect and not me??
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no subject
Date: 2002-10-20 08:12 pm (UTC)Not meant as a reflection on you of course, but I always held the opinion that there has to be wrong with people with people who would jump out of a perfectly good plane, parachute or no parachute. Isn't their some part of their brain that says 'Uhhh...This could hurt...a lot'? And don't get me started on bungee jumpers.
On the whole, I think I would rather kiss another guy on the lips :)
Why can't we all change a little and meet in the middle? Why does no-one believe in compromise, I feel like I'm doing all the work and having to transform into someone else. Why is everyone else perfect and not me??
Everyone in life is on a journey.
It is not important to know the destination.
Some people do, and these are the unfortunate ones, for they have no view other than their destination.
The important part is not the goal, because there is always a better there and a better then.
The important part is the here and the now, because there is no better here and no better now.