![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gemfyreSomeone make me do something stupid!!
I need to take a risk, I need to prove that I'm worth something.
I'm just so fucking scared of losing people I love and fucking myself up beyond repair.
But I WANT to do it to. I want to make people worried and excited and jealous and envious and everything dammit. And I've been trying to but when it all comes down it I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW. I also lack the bravery to do shit like that.
I'll jump out of a plane no problems (but not without a parachute!), but to me kisses are sacred and I'd be awfully reluctant to kiss another guy on the lips.
*sigh*
Sorry if I'm too sheltered and romantic, I just like things to be nice and simple, not a convoluted headfuck. I don't have time to be screwed up.
How do I unknot myself? If I could smooth out and untie my mind maybe I wouldn't always be so bloody exhausted.
I don't know what is the truth and what is my skewed perception. Why do I feel like the only one that is seen as needing to change? Does no-one else believe in self-improvement? Or are you all content to wallow in your lots and complain you never have enough, instead of doing something about it?
*frustrate*
Why can't we all change a little and meet in the middle? Why does no-one believe in compromise, I feel like I'm doing all the work and having to transform into someone else. Why is everyone else perfect and not me??
I need to take a risk, I need to prove that I'm worth something.
I'm just so fucking scared of losing people I love and fucking myself up beyond repair.
But I WANT to do it to. I want to make people worried and excited and jealous and envious and everything dammit. And I've been trying to but when it all comes down it I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW. I also lack the bravery to do shit like that.
I'll jump out of a plane no problems (but not without a parachute!), but to me kisses are sacred and I'd be awfully reluctant to kiss another guy on the lips.
*sigh*
Sorry if I'm too sheltered and romantic, I just like things to be nice and simple, not a convoluted headfuck. I don't have time to be screwed up.
How do I unknot myself? If I could smooth out and untie my mind maybe I wouldn't always be so bloody exhausted.
I don't know what is the truth and what is my skewed perception. Why do I feel like the only one that is seen as needing to change? Does no-one else believe in self-improvement? Or are you all content to wallow in your lots and complain you never have enough, instead of doing something about it?
*frustrate*
Why can't we all change a little and meet in the middle? Why does no-one believe in compromise, I feel like I'm doing all the work and having to transform into someone else. Why is everyone else perfect and not me??
